Sunday, June 10, 2012
To start this out honestly, I am a great big walking contradiction. This post will illustrate why.
So this guy I met at karaoke a couple weeks ago has been persistently texting me, wanting to hang out and such. But the more he texts me, and the more interested he seems in me, the more my dislike builds for this fellow. We are pretty compatible otherwise, as far as I can tell from text convos but I'm already feeling suffocated which I assume is a bad sign after a couple weeks.
I am not an independent person so I don't think that's the problem. (I know some people might disagree with this statement but I am all kinds of needy. Ask my Mom and my little Sister. I almost always need to be around people or animals.) I think what it is, is that I want everything to be difficult so when its not, I don't like it.
This has been a frequent trend in my life. As soon as a boy shows interest in me, I start to dislike them. I'm chalking it up to the fact that I am not in a place in my life where I think being in a relationship is feasible in the sense that I'm really focused on other things. But I think I'm actually romantically challenged. Or that maybe I just haven't met the right person? Or that I want to destroy things before I open myself up to getting hurt?
The thing is these boys are acting from what I can tell in a pretty normal way. The way I wished other boys would act.
Things just got a little to real there. Go back and look at the funny picture I found on pinterest. Or perhaps leave me some advice on how to cancel dates in a way that will make me look completely insane and makes this guy decide I am nuts and not want to date me?