My attempt to come to terms with the ridiculousness of my life..

Sunday, June 10, 2012


To start this out honestly, I am a great big walking contradiction. This post will illustrate why.

So this guy I met at karaoke a couple weeks ago has been persistently texting me, wanting to hang out and such. But the more he texts me, and the more interested he seems in me, the more my dislike builds for this fellow. We are pretty compatible otherwise, as far as I can tell from text convos but I'm already feeling suffocated which I assume is a bad sign after a couple weeks.

I am not an independent person so I don't think that's the problem. (I know some people might disagree with this statement but I am all kinds of needy. Ask my Mom and my little Sister. I almost always need to be around people or animals.) I think what it is, is that I want everything to be difficult so when its not, I don't like it.

This has been a frequent trend in my life. As soon as a boy shows interest in me, I start to dislike them. I'm chalking it up to the fact that I am not in a place in my life where I think being in a relationship is feasible in the sense that I'm really focused on other things. But I think I'm actually romantically challenged. Or that maybe I just haven't met the right person? Or that I want to destroy things before I open myself up to getting hurt?

The thing is these boys are acting from what I can tell in a pretty normal way. The way I wished other boys would act.

Things just got a little to real there. Go back and look at the funny picture I found on pinterest. Or perhaps leave me some advice on how to cancel dates in a way that will make me look completely insane and makes this guy decide I am nuts and not want to date me?


  1. It happens too much, we're just sitting around and suddenly you're like geez I want someone to cuddle with and you just want nothing more than someone that likes you. Everyone feels like that sometimes.

    The fact that when finally you get someone to pay this attention to you and then you think I DON'T WANT THAT! does not make you crazy. It makes you normal.

    Everyone wants someone. Fact. That doesnt mean the next guy that comes along in your life will be that person. And you shouldn't feel bad about it or that you are being self sabotaging or anything. You are being normal.

    You either like someone, or you don't. You let them into your life, or you don't. When the right person comes along nothing in the verse will be able to stop what happens next :)

  2. I agree with Tyler.

    case in point, me with julian :don't touch me, don't talk to me, why are we even dating, oh right I hate being alone.

    Shane: crept out of nowhere, don't mind touching OR talking to. worked out by mistake.

    Feeling suffocated already is normal and should be listened to more often. I wasted 4 years I would have preferred to be alone for.

  3. I just wrote a post about this very subject the other day. I am totally in the same boat, pof guy is really nice and great but he likes me too much so I'm bored. I'm listening to these two wise women above me, they seem to know what they're talkin about. As for cancelling dates and lookin crazy, may I refer you to our basket ball video? Maybe just act like that.

  4. I think you need should re-enact the "Mr. Masturbator" date :

    You've probably found your Mr. Boring, and you just need to keep your book open until Mr. More-Compatible comes along.
    When it's time to work out, everything always does.

    until then, enjoy yourself. go on a date and do something stupid on purpose. then tell us about it!

  5. omg I so relate to this post! I agree with Whitney in the you should listen to the suffucating feeling thing. And I guess so many people already answered that you don't need more advice. I just know that personally, sometimes I feel suffocated when a guy texts me every two days but another guy will text me every morning to wish me good morning and every night to with me goodnight and we'll talk maybe in the afternoon once a week or something and I'll find that cute. So the suffocation is probably more an intuition kind of thing than a he seems to like me too much kind of thing.

    Maybe it's a turn off for you when a guy likes you too much because you don't like him as much? And when a guy you actually like will act like that, your body won't react the same and everything will be great. So in a way maybe it's just your heart trying to tell you he's not the right guy for you but your mind processes it as a turn off.

    I hope this makes sense haha